The Single Cynic: Think twice before you reschedule a flight for the suggestion of a drink

I was smitten by her fair hair and blue eyes as soon as I met Emily. Having spent several weeks pitching a project idea to her over phone calls and emails, we had been working together for about six months. 

We arranged to have lunch in the restaurant of a central London hotel with a potential colleague who might join the project as well. Before he joined us, the conversation flowed easily, from our families to interests outside, as well as work-related matters. 

When Emily had arrived, she suggested we could perhaps stay on afterwards for a glass of wine together. Our lunch lasted an hour. While she went to the bathroom, I logged in to the airline’s website and changed my flight home to one later that evening.

I looked forward to what might be a chance to get to know her a bit better, maybe even go somewhere for dinner too, and wind down of a Friday evening. After we made some plans for the next stage of the project, I asked if she’d still like to have a drink. 

It would have to be another time, she said, more matter-of-fact than apologetic, as she needed to collect some equipment for a work trip she was making the following morning. I’m not sure if the disappointment showed on my face.

Once she’d left, I logged back on to see if I could change my flight back. There were no seats left. I now had a wait of four or five hours before my homeward journey unless I wanted to waste even more money.

Some months later, I was back in London for various meetings. I used a hot desk in Emily’s office as a base in between them. After work, she mentioned she was attending a small premiere of a documentary a friend had helped to make. I said I hadn’t made any plans for that evening and asked if I could join her.

The film really resonated with me and as others left, I was one of a small chatty group of about eight of us remaining with Emily. We decided to repair to a nearby restaurant for dinner.

After a few glasses of wine, Emily was the centre of attention most of the time and had a mischievous sense of humour. My fascination and curiosity was piqued even more. It was one of those rare nights out with like-minded people, and we all followed each other on social media afterwards. 

She responded with only a smiling face emoji when I texted her the following morning to thank her for the enjoyable evening, adding that she was amusing and fun after a few drinks.

Our project’s funding got reallocated elsewhere, unfortunately, and while we’ve had a few work-related calls and emails and the occasional friendly text since, we did not meet up again.

A couple of years ago, Emily posted some photos on social media with her female partner. It seemed my hope had been misplaced anyway. But at least it’s something to self-deprecatingly tell close friends about.

If you’re currently on the dating scene you might benefit from a masterclass in online dating from cyberpsychologist Dr Nicola Fox Hamilton.